It’s been a long time …

It’s been a long time, hasn’t it? Sorry, my bad. I was off in Albuquerque for a while and have been hella busy with work. And then when I’m not working, I basically just needed time to sit back and relax. Now I have a few days off and have been busy watching the worst movies known to man. Truth. Terrible, terrible movies. Movies that make people cringe when you say the title.

Just yesterday, I watched a movie called Death Race. Yes, the 2008 thriller with Jason Statham. Part “Fast And Furious,” part “Waterworld,” part “Days Of Thunder.” Ok, well maybe not that last part. Yeah, so a real winner. Plus this happened to be the unrated version so the scene where 14K buys it was definitely extra gruesome. Overall, a pretty terrible movie. Plus, the week before, I happened to catch National Treasure 2 and something probably equally as terrible.

But today, today I topped all of them with the worst possible movie ever. It is called In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale and also starred Jason Statham. You can probably see a theme here; I catch most movies with this guy, even if they are notoriously terrible (Transporter 1 was probably the least offensive to the soul as far as action movies go. The Lock Stock and brit movies remain untarnished, cinema gold stuff). This movie down right stunk. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was direct to DVD.

Strangely enough, the trailer doesn’t look too terrible. Then you realize they just cut scenes from the Lord Of The Rings and replaced hobbits with bald brits. I won’t even try to explain the plot; it’s just not worth it. Plus, the acting. Ooofffff, so frigging bad. I can only assume the script was written during the writers strike. The word putrid comes to mind. Feel free to LOL at these comments left on IMDB.

Ok, now it’s time to get back to my terrible movie marathon. What’ll it be? Tokyo Drift or something equally as terrible.

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1 Comment

  1. jason statham’s movies are always either killers or absolutely awful. it sucks because he’d probably be my favorite actor if he exercised some quality control, but at this point i have to read like 10 good reviews before i’ll go see anything of his. you catch the bank job? so good.

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